which type of parenting is most effective during adolescence - Parenting Goal

Adolescence is a time of great change and with that comes an increased need for parenting. Parenting an adolescent is both a challenging and turbulent time in a parent’s life. This can be a time in which kids are experimenting with drugs and alcohol, making poor choices for friends, and in some extreme cases, committing suicide. The question then arises about how best to parent during this volatile stage of life!

Researchers have been looking into which parenting style is most effective during adolescence. They’ve found something really interesting: there are two distinct types of parenting styles that can be effective at this specific time of your child’s life. Which parenting style you choose and why reveals a lot about what you think is important in this phase of their lives.

All adults want the best for their children; however, the type of parenting that is best for an adolescent may not be clear. For example, one parent may think a permissive approach is ideal while others think that authority will help turn their child around.

7 Things A Teen Needs From Parents

If you’re a parent, there’s no doubt that you want the best for your teenager. While teenagers often resist their parents’ advice, help and guidance, they still need a lot from them. Teens are under considerable pressure at this point in life, and are more susceptible to peer pressure than we ever were as children.

As you will read in the article below, there are things that parents can do to help their children develop the characteristics they need to become successful adults.

1. Communication

As a parent, it’s important to never stop communicating with your teenager. Because the more you communicate with your teen the better you get to know them and they get to know you. Communication is key in any relationship and essential between a parent and their teenagers.

2. To Be Their Role Model

There is one thing I believe all parents must do for their teens. You are your child’s role model and this is true for all kids, but it is especially important when it comes to your teen. If you have a teenage son or daughter, be their role model.

3. To Know You Believe In Them

Most teens want to know their parents believe in them. While this may be a difficult concept for parents to understand, it is an important factor that many teen girls and guys appreciate when they have become adults.

4. To Know That Mistakes Are Okay

Yes, you read the headline right. Your teen needs to know that mistakes are okay. So often teens feel that they have the weight of the world on their shoulders. They are so focused on perfection at school, sports, and other activities they enjoy that they often forget to enjoy themselves.

Mistakes are going to happen but what is important is how you deal with them. If you are constantly criticizing your child for their mistakes, then they may start to believe that mistakes are a bad thing. However, if you can point out the humanness of making mistakes and discuss the importance of learning from them, then your teen could possibly become less embarrassed by their own mistakes and conscious about correcting them.

5. Building a Strong Relationship with your Child

You’ve been an amazing parent. You’ve provided everything for your children. They have a home, clothes, food and the latest technology to keep them occupied. No matter how much you think you’re doing to provide for your teenagers, there’s more you could be doing — and it starts with building a strong relationship with your child.

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6. Opportunities for self-expression

Your teen needs place for self-expression. Expressing thoughts and feelings in an appropriate way enables a child to navigate the world with confidence, empathy, and resilience.

7. Acknowledge their Experience

When it comes to parenting teens, I’m convinced that the best thing we can do—no matter what our kids are doing or not doing—is to acknowledge their experiences and honor their choices as valid.

It’s not about taking sides or letting them win, it’s about acknowledging the emotions they are feeling and recognizing that as a parent, you’re there for them to help in any way possible. Doing this will help you understand where they are going to and also allow them to see that you understand them.

Which Parenting style is Best for Adolescents

Parenting styles are a unique and necessary component of any family. The type of parenting style that can be effective during adolescence depends on a few factors such as: the age group, social circumstances, cultural backgrounds, family history and parental values. You also have to consider how you are perceived by your children as even if they may not realise it they see you as their role model in life.

In this article we will examine and compare different types of parenting styles, their effectiveness during adolescence and discuss how these styles can influence the ways of parenting when the child grows up.

1. Authoritative Parenting

Studies have shown that authoritative parenting during adolescence may be most effective in helping your teens develop into well-adjusted adults.

Authoritative parents are warm, but their rules are clear and consistent. Kids feel loved, but also accepted and held accountable for their actions.

Authoritative parents encourage their children to accept responsibility for their choices and behavior and to become more independent as a result.

Children raised by authoritative parents are reported to be more curious, independent, and self-reliant. They also have better emotional control and report fewer social problems as adolescents.

Based on recent research, it would seem that authoritative parenting is the most effective style of parenting during adolescence. While authoritative parents start out with a firm hand, they are willing to be more flexible and have fewer rules as their child grows older. They also tend to be more involved in their child’s school life, know their child’s friends and activities, and are more likely to believe in open communication.

The bottom line: Parents should do what they think would be most effective to raise a happy, healthy, and well-adjusted child during the adolescent phase.

Characteristics of Authoritative Parenting

  1. Positive
  2. Kind
  3. Reward
  4. Praise and encourage
  5. Discipline strategies
  6. Warms

2. Authoritarian Parenting

Authoritarian parenting is a parenting style that is generally very strict and severe. In authoritarian families, rules are strict and parents do not welcome any form of questioning from the child. The parents control every aspect of their children’s behavior – how they speak to people, how they eat and dress, how they live their daily lives.

Even though most people would consider this extreme and strict method of parenting as negative, there are some places in the world where this type of parenting has proven to be effective.

As parents, we should strive to be creative and not merely authoritative. To become a creative authority parent, we can use the 3 Cs: communicate, collaborate and consult.

  • Communicate: We need to communicate directly with our children, building social and emotional connections through open and honest conversations.
  • Collaborate: We need to collaborate with our children on issues that they feel strongly about, giving them space to express their views without prejudice or judgment.
  • Consult: And finally, we must consult with our children, giving them the freedom to choose when and how to work towards their goals and dreams.
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Characteristics of Authoritarian Parenting

  1. Demanding
  2. No reward
  3. Rules follow
  4. Blindly follow
  5. Punishment
  6. No praise
  7. No encouragement
  8. No independence

3. Permissive Parenting

“Permissiveness” is an attitude that deprecates the idea of controlling children, and views them as free beings who are to be permitted to develop freely.

And before you ask ‘What is controlling parenting’ I will let you know it is “a parenting style based on the belief that controlling your child’s behaviors, thoughts and feelings is the best way to protect them.

There is a huge backlash against permissive parenting. Out of fear, we end up trying to overprotect our children. A strict regime is not helpful in the long run.

Rather, it’s better to appreciate their growing need for independence. In conjunction with open access and freedom of speech, they will have the best education possible to prepare them for the real world that awaits them.

Characteristics of Permissive Parenting

  1. Treating children like friends
  2. Lenient towards children mistake
  3. Too much loving and caring
  4. Do not impose strict guidelines for children
  5. No demand or expectation from children

4. Gentle Parenting

Gentle parenting is all about the children. It’s sweet, it’s kind and it’s soft. Gentle parenting is about raising children with kindness and empathy. It’s about being a calm and empowering force rather than an autocratic or domineering one. Sometimes known as Attachment Parenting, the idea behind gentle parenting is not just to raise happy children but to raise happy adults.

However, gentle Parenting isn’t a ‘one size fits all’ program and the researchers and authors of this style of parenting have made it clear that this isn’t something that you can just read about and immediately implement. This is a style of parenting that takes time and effort to learn. But for parents who want to give their children what they need to flourish, this might be the answer.

5. Neglectful Parenting

Neglectful parenting is when we fail to provide the necessary attention, protection, and guidance for our children. Neglectful parenting can manifest itself in a variety of ways, from not knowing what your child is doing after school to extreme cases of abuse.

This type of parenting is obviously the most ineffective. Although there may be some success due to the parent’s role as a role model, there will be many times where the child acts impulsively and makes bad decisions without their parents to keep them in check.

6. Helicopter Parenting

What is helicopter parenting? Is it bad for helicopter parents? These are valid questions as I’m sure you can be a helicopter parent without realizing it. My answer is no. Helicopter parenting isn’t necessarily a negative thing but it could be.

Being a helicopter parent means you’re heavily involved in your child’s life as if hovering over them. You make all their schedules, set up playdates for them, and even attend all of their events. While on the surface this may seem like a good thing, helicopter parenting can have serious consequences for your child.

Helicopter parents may find themselves at odds with their teenagers, and not in the way that they intended. Once their children enter the teen years, many helicopter parents will end up flying far above them, unable to help since they aren’t close enough to their children to assist them. The teenagers who really need that kind of help and guidance may very well be the ones most harmed by a parent who hovers too closely.

6. Uninvolved Parenting

Uninvolved parenting refers to a parenting style that can be either conscious or unconscious but results in a parent who is unwilling and/or unable to parent their children. In our society, many parents feel pressured to be involved in every aspect of their children’s lives. This includes ensuring that every decision, good or bad, that our children make falls in line with our beliefs, values, and rules. At one time, uninvolved parenting existed in all forms of the world however they have declined dramatically as our societies have become increasingly complex.

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Our findings showed that adolescents with uninvolved parents reported less parental supervision and more nonparental peer influence. This type of parenting creates a loose network of friends and little parental control, which is associated with greater delinquent behavior and alcohol use.

The ultimate example of this type of parenting is the completely absent father. The father is no longer educating, nurturing, or caring for his children in any way. He has essentially abandoned them to raise themselves and their mother. While this type of parenting is horrible for everyone involved, it can be especially bad for girls, who often internalize their emotions with an overly passive attitude.


As we have already mentioned, every kid is unique and therefore has different needs and desires. This is where parents should understand that children at this age need more freedom to express themselves and their individuality. The thing is that adolescence is not a disease, you can’t simply treat it with some sort of care or cure it with a certain method of parenting.

All adults want the best for their children; however, the type of parenting that is best for an adolescent may not be clear. For example, one parent may think a permissive approach is ideal while others think that authority will help turn their child around.

Each parenting style is useful in its own way. Some methods may suit you or your children better than others. Finding a parenting style that works for you and your child might not be easy in the beginning, but know that it’s worth it in the long run.

Parenting Related FAQ

Who is a good parent?

A good parent is not just someone who designs the ideal environment. That’s bad parenting. A good parent recognizes what stage their child is at, and acknowledges the child’s autonomy in that stage.

What things to consider before parenting an adolescent?

One of the most important things to remember as a parent of your teenager is that you can’t control how they think or feel; this is something that only their journey will teach them. While you can choose to support them and encourage them, it’s important not to become too attached to the outcome. The best relationship is one based on mutual understanding, support and respect, which will hopefully be reflected in some of the behaviors and attitudes that your teen comes away with.

What are some factors that influence the behavior of adolescence or teenager?

The way a teenager is raised plays a significant role in their behavior. Teenagers from functional families tend to have better outcomes than those from dysfunctional or absent families. There are also several other factors which lead to good parenting and these include the wealth and level of education, encouragement in school performance and sufficient amount of communication with the child.

Which type of parenting is most effective during adolescence in the United States?

Authoritative parenting is still considered the best parenting practice in the United States. According to a meta-analysis, people with authoritative parents showed a better self-concept, lower levels of behavior problems and higher levels of achievement.